Self Discipline vs. Discipline

Photo from PhotoBucket

Recognizing the moment of choice is the key to changing my behavior. When the Lord is "working" on me in a specific area, I must pay attention. It takes intentional attention in that area for me change my habits or responses. Of course, I can't actually change anything. But the Holy Spirit is waiting for me to allow Him to change me. The point is that it all comes down to recognizing that instant in time when I am faced with a choice. When I allow Him to actually show me the two paths, I make better decisions. Normally (meaning when my sin nature chooses), that split second blows past and I react according to how I feel. Rarely does that produce the Fruit of the Spirit. Slowing things down, I can actually hear the Spirit asking me if I want to glorify the Lord, or just go with my gut again.

From Photo Bucket

In teaching this principle to my children, we have used a visual aid for years. Pointing to the index finger we tell the kids, "This is you choosing to do what is right on your own. It is called Self Discipline." 

Pointing to the pinkie, "This is you choosing for someone else to make you do what is right. It's called Discipline. But you chose." When we see them stepping up to that fork in the road where they are choosing a path, we hold up these two fingers and say, "Pick one." It causes them to be intentional. It causes them to recognize the moment of decision. It causes them to understand that they are indeed the one responsible for the choice.

And when they do need to be disciplined, we remind them it was because they chose not to do the right thing on their own.We don't choose to discipline them. They choose to be disciplined. Shifting the responsibility back where it belongs helps them, and me, to recognize the consequences of the choice made.


The Lord, in His most loving discipline, allows us to experience consequences so that we learn to make better choices. When we lovingly discipline our children in the same way, they, too, learn to choose better.