Boredom and a Toilet Brush

The day the Wedgits arrived

This should have been included in Permission to Parent because it's a "biggie!" But, I didn't think of it until now. So consider this an addendum. 

Stop for a moment and consider how much time, effort, and money are spent trying to sell you a next greatest form of entertainment for your children (or yourself--but that topic is for another day). As Christians, anytime we see a huge effort from "the world" to sell us something, we should immediately ask ourselves if it is a move by the evil one to distract us from Truth. Why this constant bombardment? Movies, video games, phones that will bake a cake, social networking, and on and on and on. Why? Why are we expected to believe that we need to be entertained? That we have a right to be entertained?


Doesn't it just smell like a counterfeit intended to deceive us?


When we contemplate the attributes of God, one that defines so much of what we experience on this earth is His Creative Nature. Everywhere we look, we see Him revealing Himself and His Nature through the Creation. What does He want us to learn as we gaze on His creativity? As beings made in His image, what does that nature mean to us? Aren't we supposed to be creative, like our Father?  When you see someone using their God-given talents and abilities to create, and through their creativity our Father receives glory, doesn't it cause you to worship?


Therein lies the rub. The evil one desperately wants to thwart anything in us that looks like Him! Because when we reflect Him, that reflection is filled with Life. And that is our most compelling "argument" to defeat the lies and imitations the evil one uses to bind up and destroy. 


So, what does all that have to do with entertainment and our role of parenting?


Our children are naturally creative. As parents, we need to encourage that creativity. But our children don't always want to put in the effort needed to cultivate their creative talents and giftings. 

My encouragement to you is this: DO NOT ENTERTAIN THEM!

(Disclaimer: Please understand, I am NOT saying that you are evil if you let your kids watch an occasional video. But if that is always Plan A, it may be time to rethink some things.)


While your children are small, don't always pop in a dvd when you want them to leave you alone for a few minutes. Don't always give them video games. Don't always allow them to demand that you entertain them. Instead, cultivate a spirit of creativity in your home. Provide them with tools, not toys. Invest in quality things that you will keep forever, not just junk that ends up in the trash or a garage sale. Tools, as I use it here, means everything from wonderful books, to art and craft supplies, to great outdoor activities, to fascinating things to build with, to cameras, etc. It can include anything that fosters creativity. 


Your attitude toward how they chose to spend their free time is also very important (and should be reflected in how they see us spending our free time). We must train them to accept the responsibility to use their "free time" wisely. 

This may sound extreme, but we were very serious about the child's responsibility to "entertain" themselves. And so, if any of our children uttered the dreaded, "I'm bored", they were sent to scrub the toilets. We explained to them that God has designed them with a wonderful imagination and He expects us to use it for His glory. And when they chose to be bored, because it is their choice, we would supply them with something productive to do. 


Our first three children still tease me because, until the oldest was about twelve, they didn't know our television had Saturday morning cartoons on it. They were under the impression that only Grandma's tv had them, because the only time they watched them was when we traveled to their house and someone there turned them on. One day, they realized those same cartoons were on our television and they looked at me with the most incredulous looks. Since then, they have actually told me "thank you" for not allowing them to waste their time mindlessly watching television. Yes, we do watch some television. But it is limited. And if a child shows us they haven't learned to properly make use of their own time, their opportunities to watch television are basically non-existent. 


A word of encouragement here if it will be necessary "to unlearn" some of the ways things have been done up to now: have the kids sit down and explain to them that you, as their parent, have learned a better way to do things. (This works with anything the Lord shows me that needs "upgrading.") Tell them that the Lord wants us to use our free time to create and be productive, because when we do we are like Him. They will understand. They may not like how the new path feels initially, but that is okay. Your attitude of enthusiastic encouragement will help them as they exercise their newly found "creativity-muscles." At first, you may have to help them consider all the choices they have for being creative by listing the resources you have provided. But at a certain point, when you know they are simply not wanting to engage in the creative process and take responsibility for the wise use of their free time, hand them a toilet brush. It really works! And until they "buy in" to the new plan, your toilets will always be clean!


A few of the things we have invested in over the years:
Wedgits
Legos
Rokenbok
Knex
Brio Trains
Living Books
A comb binder (to make books)
A whole host of games (I love the games from Timberdoodle) 
Tool Boxes with real tools
Sewing machines
A big fort outside, complete with zip line
Lots of scissors, paper, glue, stamps, markers, colored pencils, pipe cleaners, stencils, drawing books, glitter, fabric, etc.


Basically, when buying things to encourage creativity look for items that are open ended, that allow unlimited outcomes. Outcomes to be determined by the imagination of your child, not the limitations of the toy/tool. 

One testimony here of just how faithfully the Lord grows the character we try to teach our children: 
Years ago, we gave Hannah (our oldest) a nice camera. I think it was for her birthday or Christmas. She didn't get much else, because that used up the budget. But that camera encouraged her natural giftings and abilities and she is now a professional photographer. She uses her gift to help others see their God given beauty and she considers it part of her ministry for the Lord. And, because there is so much flexibility she can work out of her home and schedule it around her husband's job. Here is her blog, in case you would like to see some of her work (her new website is under construction). 
Hannah Katherine Photography