Some Day My Prince Will Come

 

Just a few days after returning from Russia with our two new sons, I had to make a mad dash to Target. Joshua and Benjamin were much smaller than we had expected and so none of the clothes we bought fit them. The orphanage they lived in had so little they couldn't spare a single item of clothing, so they were delivered to us in their birthday suits. We had bought all the clothing they were to wear on the trip home before ever meeting them, sized according to measurements from the orphanage. Let me just say it was a very good thing we took belts for them. Otherwise, their pants would have fallen off somewhere between Magadan and Moscow!

So a couple of days after becoming Texans, I took them to Target. Our church had given us a Gift Card Shower before we left for Russia. It was such a huge blessing! We were able to get everything they needed because of the generosity of our sweet church family. 

The first couple of months the boys were with us were filled with so many firsts. I would love to have been able to understand them as they jabbered to each other about all the new things they saw and experienced. 

Magadan, Russia doesn't have a Target. Or anything even remotely related to it. When we walked into the store, their eyes were as big as half dollars and their mouths gaped. Elizabeth, then 6, and Rebekah, 4, were with us. 

I had to keep a close eye on the boys because, had they become separated from us, there was no way for them to communicate with anyone.

Shopping for clothes while counting heads was like trying to herd cats. 

Suddenly, I realized Rebekah was not "in the group." Looking frantically around, I heard singing. I spotted her.

She was standing on the bottom rail of one of the circular childrens clothing racks, while holding on to the top rail. She had a "far away" look in her eyes and, as I listened more closely, I heard what she was singing.

"Some day my prince will come . . ."

A sense of humor is prerequisite to life in The Antbed!

CHL

Two of our future National Rifle Association members

Okay, if you know what those initials mean, you will know where this is headed. CHL stands for Concealed Handgun License. 

I know!

You are shocked that I know what those initials mean.

Well, I do live with all these people who go out and shoot things to put in our freezer.

When a certain person, who shall remain nameless, was elected, many firm believers in the 2nd Amendment felt their Constitutional right to bear arms was in grave danger. My husband's response was not only to buy more guns and ammo, (like he really needed an excuse :) but to sign up for a class to get his CHL. We had some friends who thought it was a great idea. And before I knew what was happening, it was this big social event and I had a ticket!!! What does one wear to a CHL class? Should I have my nails done? Wait a minute! I've never had my nails done.

Anyway, as the day approached I kept asking myself how on earth I had been sucked into this vicious vortex? I had never shot a handgun IN MY LIFE!! I've only shot the long ones once or twice. 

But since Kregg really wanted me to do it, I guessed I should. He kept telling me how fun it would be. But, I couldn't hear him over my hyperventilation.

The class lasts 12 hours and then there is a written test. That part didn't make me nervous. Irritated, yes. Nervous, no. 

It started on a Saturday morning at 7 a. m. across town!! That's just WRONG on so many levels. But, off we went. Our friends even came to pick us up! I think that was an insurance policy to make sure I didn't back out at the last minute. They wanted to shame me into coming. It worked.

The day was at least 47 hours long. But that allowed us to do all kinds of fun things like have our fingerprints and mugshots taken! We are in the database!  At the end of the day, we took our written exam. I have always done well on exams and so, even though I knew nothing prior to that morning about handguns or laws or things, I made a perfect score.

But the real fun didn't start until the next day. After church, we went to the gun range to do our qualifying shoot. Just saying that makes me laugh! To qualify, we had to be able to shoot a certain number of shots in a certain amount of time from different distances. The shots are scored according to what part of the target you hit. The target is a silhouette of a person!!! I'm just having all kinds of mental issues

Well, we arrived at the range and I know I must have looked like a deer in the headlights. I was thinking, "I cannot do this! I cannot do this! I cannot do this!" I didn't even know how to load the goofy thing. The other two wives who were in my same predicament were feeling exactly the same way. Thankfully, a really sweet lady, who just happens to shoot competitively, offered to take the three of us down to another stall at the range and work with us for a few minutes. She even let us use her guns. It really did help. A lot.

The thing I was dreading the most was having people watch me. I know it shouldn't matter. But I was really embarrassed about trying to do this in front of a bunch of crack shots. (I said "crack shots", not "crack pots"!)  But since we were having our own little private lesson, it allowed all our classmates to finish their qualifying. That was great!! They would all be done and gone by the time we got back. What a relief! I felt better. Much better.

Well, they were all finished.

But they were still all there!!

They had ALL stayed to watch us! EEEEEEKKKKKKK! Just when you think it can't possibly get any worse . . .

Well, I had two choices: muddle through or leave. Kregg really didn't want me to leave. And I really didn't want to, after already investing an ENTIRE day. Plus, what am I always telling the kids? "Finish what you start. It's about integrity. It's about diligence."

So, up to the firing line I stepped. 

You know what is the funniest part of the whole thing?

I shot the highest score in the entire class! I tied with Kregg!!!

Kregg told me that he was going to take down the alarm sign in front of the house, laminate my qualifying target, and put it on a big stake in the front yard with a sign that reads: "My wife's target." 

Hahahahaha!

First Snow Cone

We brought Joshua and Benjamin to Texas from Siberia in August. Their orphanage was in  Magadan, which is roughly north of Japan and even with Anchorage. The city sits on the Sea of Okhotsk, and there are still icebergs in the harbor in May! Imagine their shock when they came to West Texas in the middle of August!! They had probably never felt temperatures over 80 degrees, and to come to Midland when it was over 100 must have made them wonder what they had gotten themselves into. Of course, they only spoke Russian so we had to do our best to guess what they were thinking. If fact, that first couple of months we played charades a lot trying to convey meanings for things. We were probably quite amusing to watch when we were out and about with all the kids trying to communicate with the boys.

One day, we decided to take the kids for a snow cone. It had been so hot that day, we knew everyone would enjoy a treat. We had to just guess what flavor the boys would want since we couldn't ask them. We all got our cones and sat down on the patio to eat them. Kregg and I were just talking when we noticed Josh and Ben were crying. What on earth??? We couldn't imagine what could be wrong! They were sitting there eating their snowcones with tears running down their faces!! We tried to ask them, but they had no idea what we were saying or how to answer us. 

Then it dawned on me!! BRAIN FREEZE!! 

The poor little things had no idea what was wrong! They loved these new treats, but suddenly, inexplicably they each had a horrible headache! Of course, never having had one before they didn't know to eat them slowly. And we didn't even think about it! We felt terrible! We made them stop eating for a few minutes to give the brain freeze time to go away, but I think they thought they were in trouble. They just couldn't win!!

Things sure did grow easier as they picked up some English!

Camping with the Stomach Bug

Over the years, almost all our camping trips have been filled with fun and adventure. There have been, however, glaring exceptions.

For Easter weekend several years ago, we went camping with a large group of friends from church and our neighborhood. I can't even remember how many families went, but there were throngs of children. (and, no, they were not all mine!)

For some unknown reason, the campsite we were assigned was far removed from the rest of the group. Since the park was full, there was no remedy. It was like we were already quarantined. How did they know?

We arrived and got our pop-up camper all set up. That is, all set up except for the electricity and water. We had arrived later than we hoped and as soon as we "landed", we went down to see all our friends. That part was just fine. 


They were all visiting and finishing setting up their campsites. Everyone was enjoying settling in and looking forward to our holiday weekend extravaganza. 

Little did we know . . .


It started getting dark, and then the fun really began. Elizabeth, who was only a toddler, started throwing up. I snatched her up and started carrying her up to our campsite, which was now 17 miles away, it seemed. On the way, she left a nice little "deposit" in each of our friends' campsites.


When I finally arrived at our pop-up, no electricity or water. EEEEEKKKKKK! 


Whoever invented wet wipes has my undying gratitude. Since that was all I had available to me, that's what I used. When Kregg finally finished visiting and returned to our trailer, I was not happy. I think he thought I would clean her up and return. He was thinking she wasn't actually sick, but just got choked or something. She did have an extremely sensitive gag reflex. But, I was assuming it was a bug and didn't want to expose anyone else. 


Anyway, when he arrived I told him I wanted to pack up and go home. He convinced me to wait it out and see if maybe it was a fluke. 

So we stayed.


It wasn't a fluke. She was sick for the first 24 hours, or so, but we stayed and I just kept her away from everyone. After that first day, it seemed it was over. She ate and kept everything down. We thought we were home free. 

Enjoying the rest of the weekend, we had no idea that Round 2 was just around the corner.


The last day of our trip, we had lunch, packed up and headed home. We dropped the trailer at the house and then headed to Golden Corral to grab dinner. Getting all the kids through the line, we finally found a table that would seat us all. The restaurant was packed. Of course. Elizabeth was sitting in a booster seat across the table from me. I had just sat down when, you guessed it didn't you, she let loose! All over the table! To the horror of everyone around us who had, up until that moment, been peacefully enjoying their dinner.


My instant mom reflex had her scooped up and out the door before she could let go again. I called back over my shoulder, "I'll be back in a few minutes." 


I drove home, put her in the bathtub, put her clothes in the washer, got her out and dried off, then dressed again. We drove back to Golden Corral where I poked my head in the door to tell Kregg I was there.


Did you know Golden Corral will let you take a to-go box from their buffet?


They will when they really don't want you to come back inside their restaurant.

Self Discipline vs. Discipline

Photo from PhotoBucket

Recognizing the moment of choice is the key to changing my behavior. When the Lord is "working" on me in a specific area, I must pay attention. It takes intentional attention in that area for me change my habits or responses. Of course, I can't actually change anything. But the Holy Spirit is waiting for me to allow Him to change me. The point is that it all comes down to recognizing that instant in time when I am faced with a choice. When I allow Him to actually show me the two paths, I make better decisions. Normally (meaning when my sin nature chooses), that split second blows past and I react according to how I feel. Rarely does that produce the Fruit of the Spirit. Slowing things down, I can actually hear the Spirit asking me if I want to glorify the Lord, or just go with my gut again.

From Photo Bucket

In teaching this principle to my children, we have used a visual aid for years. Pointing to the index finger we tell the kids, "This is you choosing to do what is right on your own. It is called Self Discipline." 

Pointing to the pinkie, "This is you choosing for someone else to make you do what is right. It's called Discipline. But you chose." When we see them stepping up to that fork in the road where they are choosing a path, we hold up these two fingers and say, "Pick one." It causes them to be intentional. It causes them to recognize the moment of decision. It causes them to understand that they are indeed the one responsible for the choice.

And when they do need to be disciplined, we remind them it was because they chose not to do the right thing on their own.We don't choose to discipline them. They choose to be disciplined. Shifting the responsibility back where it belongs helps them, and me, to recognize the consequences of the choice made.


The Lord, in His most loving discipline, allows us to experience consequences so that we learn to make better choices. When we lovingly discipline our children in the same way, they, too, learn to choose better.

Patriarchal Blessings

From the left, Corinna, (my sister in law) John, (my brother) Dad, Joyce, (Dad's wife) and Rebekah.

My precious father went home to be with the Lord in February. 

I miss him. 

We often did not see eye to eye, but I always knew he loved me and wanted what was best for me. There were, in fact, many times we had strong disagreements. But he was always willing to listen to my heart, even when we found no resolution. 

The day these pictures were taken, we had traveled to Fort Worth to celebrate his 84th birthday. He was upset with me over a decision Kregg and I had made. But in spite of that, he did the most wonderful thing! As a patriarch, he spoke a blessing and prayed over each of my children. These pictures, even though bittersweet for me, are such a beautiful way to remember him now that he is Home.

           

We had finished our lunch, and the kids starting making their way over to Dad to hug his neck before we left. At first, he was just giving them a hug, but then he started praying over each one of them. Rebekah and Joshua were first in line.
   
                                   



         
            
Levi and Cole are in line behind Rebekah. They are my nephews.

          
     

                 
                              

 This is my niece, Sarah. 

           
Daniel, my nephew, bending over to hug Dad while being prayed over.



           
Grant, another nephew, having his turn.


            


             
This is our youngest son, Ben. 


                   
Our third daughter, Elizabeth, listening to Grandpa J. D.



                                              
This is little Rachael, my niece. It was the most adorable moment. She had watched all her older siblings and cousins. So when it was her turn, she walked up and just laid her little head on Dad’s arm to be prayed over. We all melted.

                          
Such a precious little face, and to have Dad’s enormous hands so gently cradling that little cheek makes me weep. Again. I do that a lot in the face of Beauty. Thank you, Lord for my father who tried so very hard to do what he believed was right. I am blessed to have such a heritage of faith.

                                                 
This picture is pretty blurry, but this is Mackenzy, our second daughter.


                                                   
Caleb, our oldest son, had just graduated from high school.


                                          
This is our oldest, Hannah. At the time of this picture, she was engaged with the wedding later in the month.


                              
I love you, Dad!! Thank you for blessing our children. Thank you for such a precious memory.

Class Clown

 

Each of our children is a unique creation. They are all designed by our Father with a custom package of talents, gifts, and abilities, for which we are thankful. Some of them just happen to also be quite entertaining. I guess He he thought it was time to throw some comedic relief into the mix. Enter: Rebekah

Rebekah is the youngest of seven. She is ten now and I believe the Lord, in His Mercy, saved her for last because He knew we would need everything we have ever learned about parenting to raise this one. She is quite challenging on many levels. Not only is she very gifted, she is also more strong willed than anyone I have ever known. And that is saying a lot considering some of our other children. The Lord intends that strong will to become incredible determination and perseverance to accomplish His Will. In the meantime, it requires much discipline and instruction. 

Hmmm . . . Why would the Lord give me multiples in this category? Could it be because I, too, am strong willed??? :)

Not only is she strong willed. She is also hilarious!

Here are a few examples:

Yesterday, we were talking about how the Lord is the Author of every content area we study in our school and I was asking the kids to think about ways they could see how the Lord had revealed Himself through math. My question was initially followed by silence. Then Rebekah said, "Math is like God: You have to die to 'get' it/It. Do you get it? (with a big smile on her face)"

A few days ago, I was explaining to another one of our daughters that it wouldn't be too long before her eyebrows might need to be plucked, Rebekah said, "I'm never plucking my eyebrows or shaving. I like my hairs. I like the hairs in my eyebrows, the hairs on my legs and the hairs on my arms. I want to keep it all!"

Her reflections on being outsmarted by a mouse in the garage: "These must be really smart mice because they keep dragging my trap away. It's like they think it's just something in their house and they keep moving it around."

During her poetry recitation yesterday morning she got to being silly and by the end of it, we were all laughing so hard, there were tears running down our faces. Between poems she would interject comments like: "I need to put on deodorant, my armpits smell like rotting fish." (I don't think she has ever actually smelled rotting fish, but her imagination is so vivid that she might as well have smelled it everyday for the last year!)

After returning from the application of her deodorant, she said: "It didn't really stick because they (her "pits") were so sweaty." (She had put on a pair sweats yesterday morning, thinking it was going to be cold.)

Because I was trying to avoid positioning myself directly downwind, she asked me, "What's wrong? Are you afraid of my 'pits of death'?" What can you possibly do but laugh, at that point?

After I explained to her that she would need to scrub her armpits and then reapply her deodorant, she asked, "Should I use SOS pads?"

Later in the day, she said, "That's weird: After I ate my apple, my nose started running." (with a puzzled look on her face)

When Elizabeth complained of a fly trying to fly into her eyes, Rebekah said, "It was probably trying to get moisture. That's what the flies in Africa do." How does she know these things?? Even when she isn't trying, she's funny.

And during history she asked me, "You know that ancestor thing?" (Ancestry.com, an online genealogical search engine that her grandmother uses) "Does it have if you came from Shem, Ham, or Japheth?" 

I told her, "No, honey. It doesn't go back that far."

Never a dull moment! Boy, I sure am glad we don't ever have to worry about boredom around here. Easier to sleep at night with that off my list, you know?

Joshua Goes Public

Kregg, Joshua and Caleb

Our oldest son’s name is Caleb. He is 18. For the first several years of his young life, he had all sisters and no brothers. When he was 9 or 10, he used to tell us that he was praying for brothers. We would smile and tell him that was “nice”, naively having no idea what was coming. 

Well, the Lord answered Caleb’s prayers when He sent Joshua and Benjamin to be our sons. I don’t know many 18 year old young men who share a bedroom with two younger brothers (12 and 13). There are times he wants to pull his hair out (or maybe theirs). But he is very aware of the influence he has on these two young brothers. They adore him and watch everything he does. 

Joshua has really been maturing over the past several months in his understanding of what the Lord requires of him. He recently came to believe it was time to “go public” with his faith in Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior. We were thrilled. The Lord is bringing forth so much fruit in his young life. His prayers have gone from the sweet, innocent prayers of a young boy to the requests of a young man asking the Lord for wisdom, and praying for the salvation of his birth parents. His Heavenly Father is maturing him in his faith.

Six years ago, Josh and Ben had never even heard of Jesus. When they arrived at the orphanage in Magadan, Siberia after being taken away from their parents, Ben was 3 1/2 and Joshua was 4 1/2. They didn’t know what a toothbrush was. They didn’t know how to sit at a table and eat a meal. They didn’t even speak their native language well.


During these past six years as our sons, they have learned so much:  how to speak English, what it means to be in a family, how important it is to tell the truth, the need to obey us as their new parents, how to take care of their responsibilities, how to forgive their biological parents, and most importantly of all, they have learned about God. He has Faithfully revealed Himself to them.
 





As Kregg made plans to baptize the fourth of our children, he asked Caleb to assist. It was perfect. The two men who have had the biggest influence on Joshua were going to bury him in the waters of baptism after hearing him publicly confess his belief in Christ.

Lots of sweet friends came to give him a hug

Yes, I was weeping.

The Lord is so Faithful!

Logistics of Homeschooling

Rebekah and Elizabeth examining a spider

Not surprisingly, the question it seems most people initially ask when it comes to Homeschooling is this: 

"How on earth can it all (the schoolwork, cooking, cleaning, relationships, extra activities, church, etc., etc.) be accomplished?" (Or some variation, thereof)

I wish I had kept track of how many times this question has been asked when someone learns we homeschool. Yes, the "socialization" question comes up, too. But that is for another discussion. 

The only way I really know to answer this question is to explain it in terms of a lifestyle. What I mean by that is, when you make the conscious decision to take up the mantle of "teacher of my children", there is a paradigm shift in the way you look at each activity and decision you make in your day. When you accept that responsibility, it provides a framework into which all your other "jobs" fit. 

After my relationship with the Lord, and being my husband's helpmeet, the training of my children comes before everything else. It is a season of life that requires my full and undivided attention. Many other "good" things must wait until this season is complete. We have to choose very carefully what goes on "our list" as a family. If it does not help us in this season, even if it is a "worthy" activity, we must say "no" to it for now.


In providing them a "proper" education, the Lord would have me show them His Handiwork and His Authorship of all "content" areas we cover in our schooling. But as a homeschooler, our learning does not simply include mathematics, or Greek and Latin roots. It extends to include every part of our life as a family.

This is where the fruit is so abundant. 

When my children understand that all the work of our hands and minds is intended to Glorify Him, they capture the scope of what a true education provides. Anytime knowledge, skill or work is separated from the Author of Life, it is a vain pursuit. It has at that point become an end unto itself. The Life is gone. The only reason to pursue "academics" is to better understand Him. It is not to "be successful" when we grow up. That is a byproduct of a much bigger purpose.

Kregg and five of our seven, plus a "borrowed" one

The Lord intends for every moment of our day to draw us into a fuller understanding of Who He Is and how we can better reflect His Glory. When that becomes the framework, then the household chores and family responsibilities are as much a part of schooling as are science and logic. There is no separation or compartmentalization to our lives. It is ALL about the same thing. 

Some of the kids helping Kregg with an outdoor project

That makes a huge difference. Everyone helps with whatever needs to be done. And that is why the logistics work. That is also why I am more convinced than ever that this is what the Lord asks of me each day.

I didn't understand all of this eighteen years ago, when I started homeschooling. Thankfully, He has patiently continued to reveal these principles. Part of me would love to go back and start this journey from the beginning, knowing what I now know. 

But, He knew. And He Faithfully redeems the parts I didn't do well. Because He loves them more than I do, He will continue to redeem the parts I don't do well in the future. 

My hope is that what I have learned through all these years may help to shorten the time it takes someone else to capture a larger vision for what He can do through our homes and our children. 

We serve an Awesome God. We must allow Him to expand our short-sighted and limited understanding of what are families are supposed to be and do. The only way to do this is by receiving His Vision for our families. And it is "more than we could ever ask or imagine"!

Glacier National Park

The whole crew

We are known for our epic road trips. Some people want to come with us, others think we are nuts. I think the latter group has more votes. Living where we do, it takes a long time to get to the places we want to see. Because of this, we try to fit in as much as possible and still maintain our sanity. As hard as we try to see everything, we do have to make choices. When planning our trip west, we debated long and hard about whether we could make it all the way to Glacier National Park. 

Now you have to understand that we weren't just planning for our family. My younger sister, her husband and their six children and one of my older sisters were all going with us. We had our own caravan. For 4600 miles! 

For you to fully understand the magnitude of this undertaking, let me give you a few details: two pickups, one Suburban, one van, two travel trailers, one giant horse trailer with living quarters, one dog, thirteen children from one to 20, five adults, several two-way radios with lots of batteries, endless paper plates, plastic cups, wet wipes, and paper towels, five crockpots, nineteen days, and over 1300 gallons of fuel!!!

We decided since we were going all the way to Mount Rushmore and then to Yellowstone, we should go ahead and drive up to Glacier. After all, who knows when we would be back in the "neighborhood."

We stayed at a beautiful campground complete with fishing pond.

                  

There is water everywhere

Going to the Sun Road is one of the most scenic in the nation.

Now we know where Charlie Brown shops for his tree.

Hannah taking pictures, of course.

Lots of cousins! It's a good thing they love being together!

Levi, Cole and Joshua

We are so glad we drove all the way to Glacier. It was my favorite part of our amazing trip. It was absolutely breathtaking! If you ever get a chance, you really don't want to miss it.