Smack Between the Eyes: A Link-Up in "Pages in Our Heritage of Faith"

I am so thankful for this man. We have been married for over 26 years, parenting for over 24 of those years, and he still loves me. :) 


He generally avoids confrontations, whenever possible. But there are those times when, as the head of our family, a situation requires his gentle, but firm touch.


Today, it was me.


I required him to speak Truth into my life because I have been careless at times with the tone of voice with which I speak to my family. He lovingly explained the situation and then prayed over me.


How can you argue with that?  He's right. I can allow frustration or weariness to build inside my soul and then speak harshly to the kids or to him. That's not okay. And every time I do it, a spirit is wounded by my tone. 


I didn't want to hear it. But I needed to hear it. He did exactly what he was supposed to do as the one in authority over me. And I am thankful for it. Even though it was unpleasant, he loves me enough to give me what I need, not just what I want. 


And that's exactly what my Father does for me. He Faithfully convicts, corrects, and offers Grace for me so that I may learn to choose better going forward. He will not leave me here, at this point in my sanctification process. He doesn't want me to speak harshly to anyone, and so He, through my husband's authority, rebuked and corrected me and my heart is at peace, knowing that I am guilty as charged, knowing that they both love me too much to allow me to continue.


I'm thankful.


Today has been filled with a gentle tone of voice. And we are all better off. Any frustration or weariness needs to be taken to Him, not dumped on my sweet family. 

The Lord's Faithfulness is evident in so many ways. And I love to take notes when He, again, displays His never-ever-ending Faithfulness to me, or my family. It helps me to chronicle this Journey of sanctification so that, when the hard times come around again, I can look back and remember that, no matter how hard things seem, He will never leave me nor forsake me. Never, ever, ever. And that fills my heart with Hope.


I would love for you to link up a post here that testifies of His Faithfulness to you or to those you love. It can be something you wrote a long time ago, or something you type out right now. We give Him Glory when we declare the Truth about His nature. So jump right in with both feet. :)

Book Review: "Kisses From Katie"

What an incredibly precious testimony is contained within the pages of this book! Katie Davis has given her heart and her life to the Lord to be used however He chooses. She spends everyday serving "the least of these" in Uganda. She goes where most of us would fear to go, serving the most desperately poor and sick, without thought for her personal safety. She has 13 daughters, adopted because the Lord told her they were hers.


Her entire day is filled with simply serving the one God places in front of her, no matter who it is, or what they need. This means there are days when she brings home a child on the verge of death and does everything she can to save that life. Other days, it may mean that she goes into a neighborhood where even the locals will not go, because she has extra food and they are in need.


The book is filled with page after page of God providing for her needs in miraculous ways, ways that don't make sense to those who are not completely and totally dependent on God alone. 


"And even though I realize I cannot always mend or meet, I can enter in. I can enter into someone's pain and sit with them and know. This is Jesus. Not that He apologizes for the hard and the hurt, but that He enters in, He comes with us to the hard places. And so I continue to enter."


Her heart is evident here:
"I didn't believe it was possible to tell a child about the love of Christ without simultaneously showing her that love by feeding her, clothing her, inviting her in. If a child has never known what love is, how can we expect him to accept the love of his Savior  until we first make that love tangible?" 


And then, "I wanted to share with them the truth that many of us seemed to have overlooked--that God wanted us to care for the poor, not just care about them, but to truly take care of them, and many of us were not doing so."  


Ouch!


It is hard for us to imagine walking away from our lives, moving to a foreign country, and allowing the Lord to send us into areas of profound poverty and rampant disease, trusting completely in His Protection and Provision.


"But it is in the brilliantly, gloriously, wonderfully difficult seasons that God seems to show Himself all-powerful and in control . . . the more I give of myself, the more He fills me up. The more I love, the more love I have to give."


She came back to the U.S. for a period of several months to start college, as she had promised her parents. Her heart was in anguish, longing for Uganda and her girls. Living in the midst of such abundance, ease, and comfort now created for her an impossible tension.


"I have often wondered since reentering the United States why I feel such great culture shock. The amount of stuff that just clutters our lives. All these things make it difficult to readjust, yes. But what has been the biggest shock to my system, the huge disconnect, is that I have stepped out of my reliance on God to meet my needs. I "miss" Jesus. He hasn't disappeared, of course, but I feel so far from Him because my life is actually functioning without Him. By 'functioning,' I mean that if I am sick, I go to the drugstore or to the doctor. If I am hungry, I go to the grocery store. If I need to go somewhere, I get in my car. When I need some advice or guidance, I call my mom or go plop on my roommate's bed. If I want to feel happy, I get Brad, my little brother, or someone else to make me laugh.


I keep forgetting to ask God first to heal me, fill me, to guide me, to rejoice with me. I have to set aside 'time to pray' in the morning and at night instead of being in constant communication with Him. In Uganda, because I was so physically 'poor,' I was completely dependent on God and spiritually as wealthy as ever. As I sit here writing, I am frustrated with my own stupidity, my human willingness to step back into dependence on stuff and these places I swore I detested."


It is so very hard to be totally dependent on the Lord in the midst of our incredibly blessed lives. We need to constantly ask Him to show us our need for Him, to help us see how completely incapable of walking this life without Him in every moment.


I love this passage from the book:

"Remember, God will never give you more than you can handle."

People repeat this frequently; I heard it when I was growing up and I hear it now. It is meant to be a source of encouragement, and it would be if I believed it were true.

But I don't.

I believe that God totally, absolutely, intentionally gives us more than we can handle. Because this is when we surrender to Him and He takes over, proving Himself by doing the impossible in our lives.

Now, how's that for Perspective? Wow!

I could go on and on, at this point in the review, with stories of how God has done just that for Katie Davis. But, the thing I took away from this book is the need to allow the Lord to move us to the place where we are completely submitted to His Plan for our lives--even to the point of doing something "radical" when He asks. He will ask it of us if we are allowing Him to steer. There will be something He asks of us that, in our wisdom and strength, is completely impossible and insane. But our obedience to His request of us teaches us dependence and brings Him Glory.


Now, I do have one concern about this book. I really do not want to bring this up, but it would be completely inconsistent with so much I have said here at the Antbed and believe to be absolutely imperative to a transformed life in the very center of His Will.


When Katie was a senior in high school, she talked her parents into a mission trip to Uganda. They didn't think she should go. She kept after them until they relented. Once there, she never wanted to go home. She talked her parents into allowing her to stay for a year before returning to go to college. By that point, she was "all in." Her heart was completely captivated. And the struggle began. Eventually, she told her parents that she was not going to be able to obey them and stay for college. 


Is Katie supposed to be where she is? Absolutely.


The problem lies in trusting God to lead us through the authority He has placed over us. If she had fully submitted to that authority, as unto the Lord, I believe to the marrow of my bones that the Lord would either have given her the Grace to wait on His Perfect Timing (which would have received her parents freely given permission and blessing), OR He would have changed the hearts of her parents to be able to release her from the commitment she had given them to attend college. 


Has the Lord done incredible things through her time in Uganda? Absolutely!! 


But she expresses in the book how poorly she treated her family and friends, while here for that one college semester, because she was so conflicted. It is only when we are completely submitted to His Will through the authority He has placed over us that we can walk in perfect Peace, regardless of circumstances. It would have made her testimony even more powerful if she would have allowed Him to move in this area on her behalf, without wounding her parents or her friends. Without feeling that she had to take matters in her own hands. She uses the verses about loving Jesus even to the point of hating fathers and mothers. But when we are under authority, God uses that authority to cover and protect us and He guides us under it, not out from under it. The Lord may have had a specific lesson He wanted her to learn that would have made her ministry even more profound. I don't know. But, I do know He is perfectly capable of changing the heart of those in authority over us whenever He sees fit.


Now, please hear me here. I am NOT condemning anyone. All I'm trying to say is that, if you read this book, the fullest of blessings come in complete submission to God's Authority. 


Do I perfectly practice this? NO! That is why I recognize it so clearly--because He's trying to teach me this same lesson. 


Kisses From Katie is an incredible testimony of just how powerfully a single person can be used when they say "yes" to the Father. You will be blessed and touched by the stories of so many individuals the Lord uses Katie to minister to. I highly recommend it! :)                                               

Book Review: Valley Forge

The sequel to To Try Men's Souls, Valley Forge tells the story of the transformation of the ragtag American soldiers, who had repeatedly been defeated by the well-trained British, into an army capable of standing before the British fire without retreating. Much of the credit for this change (that eventually won the Revolution) goes to Inspector General Baron Friedrich von Stueben. 


During the dark days that followed Washington's victory at Trenton, there were many who believed Washington should be replaced. Even those like Dr. Benjamin Rush, who had previously been his staunch supporters, turned on Washington, believing he was no longer able to win the war. General Gates, who hoped to replace Washington, was waging his own war of defamation against the Commander in Chief with the members of Congress. So intent was he on his mission, that Gates retreated with Congress when they fled Philadelphia. Spending all of his time elevating his own position, instead of supporting the troops, Gates made no preparations for Washington's troops, as he had agreed to do in order that Valley Forge would be ready for the weary army to spend the winter there. 


When the troops arrived at Valley Forge, nothing had been done. There was no shelter. No food. No tools. No supplies of any kind. Gates believed that if things deteriorated sufficiently, Washington would be blamed and Gates would be his replacement.  


Washington, discouraged but not defeated, continued to work toward the goal of a new nation and freedom.  Watching his men suffer was harder for him to endure than any personal physical suffering he was subjected to. So many died that winter. So many had no shoes or coats. Food was scarce. For weeks, there wasn't even shelter for the troops from the harsh weather. They lived on the ground, exposed to all the elements. Frostbite always threatened. Sentries froze to death during the long, cold nights. And yet, the stubborn belief in a new country persisted.


While in their winter encampment, von Stueben arrived. He made his case to Washington that he knew how to train the troops so they would be able to defeat the British. Washington believed him and gave him great authority. von Stueben began immediately. The challenge was formidable. The troops were not sold on the idea. von Stueben knew he was walking a tightrope: push them to far, too fast and they would rebel; don't push them hard enough, and they wouldn't be ready in time for the season of war. 


The months covered in this book were truly the crucible for the birth of a nation. Had Washington been fighting the British alone, the story could have been much different. Being required to fight those jealous of his position, the lack of long term enlistments, those who lost confidence in his ability to successfully wage the war, Congress, Tories, Loyalists, the elements, lack of supplies and simply weariness of the soul, a man made of less determination and perseverance would have conceded defeat.


The tide began to turn for the Revolution at the Battle of Monmouth. The true value of von Stueben's training methods became apparent when the American troops finally withstood the fire of an advancing British battle line without breaking. Never again would the British believe they could simply intimidate the American troops into running. Everything changed that day.


The book ends there. I am hoping there will be another sequel written soon!


As with To Try Men's Souls, I read this one with a black pen in hand to edit out the cursing so that Rebekah can read it. There didn't seem to be as much in this volume, but it was still not something I could allow her to read unedited. 


#47 out of 52 in the "Read 52 Books in 52 Weeks Challenge." 

A Blessing For Your Family in This New School Year

As this "new year" begins for your children, whether you delegate their education or homeschool, may this season in the life of your family be filled with His richest blessings. 


May He continue to clarify your vision for your children as workers in His Kingdom. 


May He give you Wisdom to be "vision casters" for them, filling them with purpose in their tasks. 


May they see their studies as worship, finding Him as the Author of each content area. 


May they understand the importance of doing each and every job given them "as unto Him." 


May they understand the blessing of submitting to authority and the protection that affords them. 


May they delight in His Creation and how it causes us to cry out in praise. 


May they find joy in excellence, not for excellence's sake, but because we are those called by His Name and our influence on our world is profound. 


May He give them Understanding of the special talents and abilities He has Designed into their souls so that they may understand how to walk in the fullness of their gifts. 


May they learn daily how better to walk in His Strength, not theirs.


May we be their biggest cheerleaders, encouraging them always.


May He grant us Discernment so that we understand how best to speak blessings over them.


May your home be anointed with Joy.


May you delight in the presence of one another.


May He direct your ministry as a family and give you new opportunities to serve Him together.


May He call each of you to more devoted prayer, learning to take everything to Him.


May your family delight in His Word and partake together of It often.


May He draw your hearts ever closer and deepen the Love each of you has for the others. 


May you choose wisely the things to which you say, "Yes," knowing that a "yes" to one thing means a "no" to something else. May He show you which things should be on your list.


May your family be Salt and Light in a world desperately in need of godly examples of what a family looks like.


May your hearts overflow with gratitude for all His Blessings.


May you stand on the Truths that He IS Sufficient, He Is Faithful, His Grace Is Available for everything you face this year. 


May His Peace inhabit your hearts and your home.

A Husband's Leadership

The rainbow set in the sky serves to remind us of His Faithful

I have learned a great deal over the years from some very godly women about the submission of wives to their husbands. And as the Spirit continues to deepen my understanding of this principle, I must confess, I have messed this up a lot during the last 26 years of marriage. Thankfully, my husband and Father are quite patient with me.


Today, I had one of those "light bulb" moments of clarity. As we continue on the path toward becoming more like Him, there are times when, in His great Mercy, He opens our eyes to new depths of Truth. 


It came while I was having a conversation with our oldest daughter. She has now been married two years to a wonderful young man, and they have a 6 week old son. We have talked often about how to walk in submission over those two years, because she really desires to honor her husband and his headship over their family. I have explained how much I didn't understand the blessing of submission for many years and she is learning from my mistakes, so she doesn't have to make them herself.


Confession time: I struggled for a long time with thinking I knew better than Kregg did in some areas of our lives. I desperately wanted him to be the spiritual leader in our marriage, but when it came right down to it, I didn't always trust him to lead. In his spirit, he sensed my rebellion to his authority and it caused him to doubt his own ability to be what he knew God wanted him to be. God designed my husband to be the head and covering over our family, providing leadership and protection in a way that only he could. But, because I didn't fully trust, he didn't fully step into his role.


Because of my disobedience to this principle, by not trusting fully, I prevented myself from receiving what I so desperately wanted. I was my own worst enemy. Isn't that often the case? I am the one preventing myself from receiving the fullness of His Blessings. I can blame others, "If he would just lead, I would follow." But my obedience cannot be contingent on the receipt of what I want. He asks us to trust Him to provide for us, without seeing that Provision ahead of time. He asks me to have Faith: "Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." Hebrews 11:1


And so, like all other areas of my life it all boils down to this:

Do I trust Him, or don't I?

Do I believe He will do what He has promised, or do I believe I have to "take care of it myself?"

Isn't that what it boiled down to in the Garden in the Beginning of History? The evil one tempted Eve to question whether she could really trust her Father to give her the desires of her heart. She didn't trust His Hand of Provision, even though she had already witnessed the Faithfulness of Her Father over and over. The evil one did not cause Eve to sin. He simply revealed what was already in her heart: she didn't fully trust God.

I don't either. Not always. 

And, in His most loving Mercy, He allows us to try it our way, knowing the choice will be painful to us and to Him. Pain will come our way because we are outside the center of His Will. And pain will be inflicted on His Father Heart, which must once again suffer our rejection. 

Back to my submission to my husband. 

It never has been about submitting to Kregg. It has always and only ever been about my submission to Him. The submission in marriage is simply a reflection of a bigger Truth: my submission and complete trust in my God. In fact, I would go so far as to say that the submission of my spirit to my husband's position of authority and leadership is a pretty straightforward litmus test of the submission of my heart to God. 

(Now, before I go any farther, let me say this: I am not talking about abusive marriages. There comes a time when a wife should not submit. But, even in those situations, there can be in the heart of the wife an honor held for the position of "husband." When the one holding that position of authority uses that power to destroy, the Lord will give Grace to discern what His Will is for the wife. He will reveal if, when and how she should step out from under the authority of that abusive man, but it should never be in a spirit of rebellion.) 

To take things even deeper, today He showed me that the degree to which I submit things to my husband is directly reflected in how strong a leader my husband becomes for our family. Will I allow Him to lead me through Kregg? In everything? Will I submit decisions I would previously have made myself, for fear of not getting my way, to my husband and allow him to have headship in our home? Or will I continue to have areas where I am "in charge?" This doesn't mean I never make decisions. It does mean I am not making those decisions as one in authority, but as one to whom authority has been delegated, willingly holding it with an open palm before my husband and before my Father. What is the posture of my heart?

For years, I made many of the decisions concerning our children because I was the one home with them when the decision needed to be made. That is not necessarily bad, but I was operating as a "free agent" in my mind. The posture of my heart was not one of submission. I would justify it by thinking that Kregg had so much to do, I could just take most of the decisions regarding the kids off his list. After all, I was the one with them. I thought I knew them better than he did. But, do you see the trap I laid for myself? By taking authority that wasn't given to me by God, I prevented Kregg from becoming what God designed him to be: a father who is involved in every aspect of the lives of his children. 

Sometimes husbands would rather hand over part of their authority to us, which plays right into our natural tendency to usurp authority that isn't ours. The weight of responsibility can feel too heavy for them to bear and so it may be tempting for husbands to hand over aspects that are never to be delegated.  But if wives accept those things, we are actually interfering with the growth as a husband and father that God intends. We must allow the Lord to give us discernment so that we see what is properly delegated to us.

And then we must wait. And this is where I failed over and over again. If I swoop in and "take care of things" rather than waiting for my husband to engage, I am usurping his authority. The Lord will move our husbands to act on our behalf and for our children. It may not always be on my time table. We simply have to trust Him and wait. I didn't. Over and over, I just "took care of things."

But when the Lord showed me what I was doing and asked me to lay it all at His Feet, He was actually asking me if I trusted Him. And do you know what? When I finally died to it, He gave me exactly what I'd always wanted: a godly husband who is leading our family through the Wisdom he receives directly from God, and has been for years now.

Today, He showed me a new depth of this Truth:  the degree of my trust will be directly reflected in the strength of Kregg's leadership. If I truly trust God with every aspect of our family, He gives Kregg the Grace (the desire and power) to walk in the fullness of his calling as head and covering for our family. 

Once again, His Perfect Design is revealed in our lives and we are given the choice of whether to receive the blessings afforded us through complete obedience and trust. 

It's not a one time choice. You know that part we all love in His Word about taking up our cross and dying daily? It really does mean daily. I have to choose it each day. In fact, many days I have to choose it several times. But the Glory of His Blessings and Protection over our family far outweighs the pain I may suffer in having my will placed on the altar and slain again. My wonderful husband continues to grow in his role as head and covering over our family. We are so very blessed.

May we each walk in Grace (the power and desire to do His Will) to trust Him fully as we submit to the authorities He has placed over us. Daily. Hourly, if necessary. 

Linking With Encouraging Words Wednesday

Seasons of Life

Years ago, Kregg and I listened to a seminar by Gregg Harris on homeschooling. One of the sessions was on the seasons of our lives and it left an indelible mark on us. My sweet husband preached this morning because our pastor is out of town. We are in the middle of a series of lessons on healthy families, so Kregg decided to talk about the lessons we learned from that seminar.

Harris outlined our lives this way:
1. The Season of Preparation
2. The Season of Production
3. The Season of Provision
4. The Season of Protection

The Season of Preparation could also be called the season of the child. During this season, the primary responsibility is to study, learn, and prepare. This season encompasses our growing up years, the years spent during our childhood and on into becoming young adults. It is a time that should be focused on learning how to learn and walking in the responsibilities given to us in our families. This is the time when we learn about the blessings of being under authority. Those lessons, learned at the feet of our parents, are critical to having a right relationship to authority in each of the other seasons. If we pay attention and focus well on learning the lessons tied into this season, it facilitates the success of later seasons. 

The Season of Production focuses on the building of our households and careers. During this season, for most people, marriage and children, and establishing a way to support them is the focus. This is an intense time and requires focused attention, if it is to be done well. Everything we allow in this season needs to be focused on building in these areas. This is a critical time for families. It is a time when it can be very easy to become distracted or out of balance in our responsibilities. 

Too often, parents in this season allow too many things to make it onto the family calendar. We must exercise much wisdom in discerning those activities that actually bear fruit in our families and in the character of our children, versus those activities that are simply done because everyone else does them. Our children do not need twenty-seven extra curricular activities to make them "well-rounded." We shouldn't be helping with every single ministry opportunity at church. What our children need during these formative years is lots and lots of hours with their parents and their family. This is the time where parents are able to sow the most seeds into those young hearts. Do not miss it by being too busy.

The Season of Provision, also called the season of the elder, is the time in our lives when our homes and jobs are well established and flourishing. And if we have come through the previous two seasons faithfully, this is the time the Lord will broaden our ministry to those outside our immediate family. Notice that it is the Lord Who is to broaden our ministry. It is not our job! During this season, the experience and wisdom earned and learned in the previous two seasons give us the credibility and empathy to be able to mentor the next generation coming behind us as parents. This is the season to help build into the lives of others and to strongly support the Body in leadership roles.

The Season of Protection is also called the season of the "city father." This is the time of life when most people "retire" for leisurely pursuits. But, this is actually the time when we can bear the most fruit of all. Having grown in wisdom and experience through the previous three seasons, the influence wielded as a "city father" is immense. This role is absolutely critical to the life of the Body. Without godly people in this position in the Body, the whole church suffers. 

Look at the vision that is cast for us through the life of Job and his faithful fulfillment of this role:

Job 29:7-17

⁷ “When I went to the gate of the city
   and took my seat in the public square,
⁸ the young men saw me and stepped aside
   and the old men rose to their feet;
⁹ the chief men refrained from speaking
   and covered their mouths with their hands;
¹⁰ the voices of the nobles were hushed,
   and their tongues stuck to the roof of their mouths.
¹¹ Whoever heard me spoke well of me,
   and those who saw me commended me,
¹² because I rescued the poor who cried for help,
   and the fatherless who had none to assist them.
¹³ The one who was dying blessed me;
   I made the widow’s heart sing.
¹⁴ I put on righteousness as my clothing;
   justice was my robe and my turban.
¹⁵ I was eyes to the blind
   and feet to the lame.
¹⁶ I was a father to the needy;
   I took up the case of the stranger.
¹⁷ I broke the fangs of the wicked
   and snatched the victims from their teeth. 

Job had arrived at this season of his life through great trials. Because he trusted the Lord through each of the previous seasons, he was now held in great honor. His scope of influence was huge.  Job was the one who protected the helpless. He was the one who was looked to to uphold justice. A dying man would bless him because that man knew his widow and children would be taken care of by Job.

This is what each of us is to aspire to. Unfortunately, those who are truly able to walk out this season of the "city father" are rare. Too many are derailed in one of the earlier seasons and never again regain the vision for where the Lord wants to take them.

We each need to ask the Lord to help us understand our season. If we have missed any of the prerequisite lessons for where we are in life, He will "tutor" us so that we can catch up. But we have to recognize what needs to happen. We have to ask Him for wisdom. He is so Faithful. But we have to pay attention. I am convinced that one of the most effective tools used by the evil one to render His People ineffective is to tempt us to get our seasons of life out of balance. It can sound very holy to step into a position of leadership and great responsibilities in the Body when we are still in the season of Production. This takes the parents out of the home at the most crucial time for their children.

Billy Sunday was a famous traveling preacher. He became a Christian during a road trip when he was playing ball for the White Sox in the early 1900s. When he left baseball, he became the "Billy Graham" of his time. Over the course of his 39 years in ministry, he preached to over 100 million people and more than 1 million of them became Christians. 

But his children were casualties of his lack of understanding of the seasons of our lives. While his children were young, he and his wife would take months long preaching trips, leaving their children in the care of others. During those crucial years when they needed their parents so desperately, those parents were away from the home for ministry. All but one of their children ended up destroying their lives through their wrong choices. When word got out that his own children were in this condition, Billy's ministry imploded. He spent the last few years preaching in small country venues. His reputation was destroyed because he had not first provided for the needs of his own family.

I Timothy 5:8 says this: 

Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever. 

If only Billy Sunday had postponed the expansion of his ministry until his first responsibilities were fulfilled, who knows how many more he would have been able to influence. Near the end of his life, even after all the successes, he asked his wife where he had gone wrong. He had learned, bitterly, that the true measure of the success of a man is the contentment of his wife and the character of his children.

Psalm 90:12

Teach us to number our days aright that we may gain a heart of wisdom. 

Understanding Your Enemy

Photo credit

As parents, we have come up against one specific thing several times:

The evil one tries to convince our children that "correction and instruction" is "condemnation and judgment."

He whispers to them that "you aren't good enough for Mom and Dad. You can never please them." He tries to tell them they are being wrongly accused and misunderstood. This is a deception that must be actively and wisely confronted. 

Parents, we must understand our enemy. 

We must help our children understand their enemy. And it is NOT us. But that is what he will whisper to them.


If our children are not properly submitted to our authority, as unto the Lord, then they are opening themselves up to this trap of the evil one. It can be displayed with argumentative attitudes questioning our authority. In younger children, this may simply be a desire to understand the parameters of the child/parent relationship. The Spirit will help us discern the motivation of their hearts. But some children, even at a very young age, will directly challenge our authority, not as a means to understand, but testing us to see if we really mean what we say; testing us to see if they can win the battle of wills.



Through the Spirit, we must help our children understand from a very young age that if they disobey us, they are disobeying God. He has placed them under our authority to learn to be under His authority. When they are properly submitted to His Authority, directly or delegated through us, they are afforded protection from many of the attacks and schemes of the enemy. But when they bow their backs and refuse to submit, then they are removing themselves from under that protective covering, opening themselves to spiritual attack and deception. 


Out from under authority, the enemy has an easy time convincing them of his lies. And as they listen to what they want to hear (a message that affirms their wrong choices) they open themselves to a larger web of deceit. The Spirit causes their spirit to feel guilt, as a means to move them to conviction and confession for the purpose of reconciliation. If they refuse to receive that godly conviction of sin, then they must balance the guilt with blame. This is where we can become "the enemy." In direct proportion to the amount of guilt they are feeling in their spirit, without repentance, they will dish out an equal load of blame to balance the scale. When we understand this principle, we recognize the blame they direct toward us is to balance the guilt they are feeling from the Spirit. This helps us to pray more effectively.



We must arm ourselves with the Truth and constantly speak it in Love. We must pray for the Lord to teach them to desire Truth in the innermost places of their spirit. We must do battle in the spiritual realm against the lies of the enemy. We must pray for the eyes of their hearts to be open, that they will understand the true consequences of their choices. This battle cannot begin soon enough. Our children are never too young for us to engage in it. The evil one will try to lull us into a false sense of security or even denial that our precious children are capable of such open disobedience. And if we fall for it, we are right where he wants us. 


It really does come down to understanding that our fallen nature is capable of every sin known to man. If we don't really believe that we can fall into any sin, we are not appropriately engaged. And if we don't believe our children can be enticed to commit any sin, then we will not be properly motivated to provide prayer covering for them. We must be on the alert all the time. We must recognize the warning signs of the deceptions trying to take hold of them. 


He is Faithful to give us wisdom to parent these children entrusted to our care. But we must avail ourselves of that wisdom. Our "wisdom" is not enough, will never be enough. Our enemy is deceitful above all things. We must be armed with the Spirit. And we must boldly do battle for our children, always speaking the Truth in Love for the purpose of restoration.